I've never been one to complain much. I can usually roll with things pretty well. Life gets you down, sure, but you gotta do what you gotta do. But sometimes, you do need to do some complaining, a protest, a leave of absence.
I need a vacation. Well, let me rephrase that. I don't really need much except, food, water, air and Internet. I WANT a vacation. I would very much like a vacation. I desire a vacation.
There's a couple reasons why it would be great to get away about now. Incredibly, the top reason isn't the weather. This is the one time where mid-March in Ohio does not reduce a person to a blubbering pile of cold sadness. I have not been encumbered with months of snow shoveling and window scraping. The never-melting snow boulders resting upon curbs and parking lots are non-existent. My hands and face are not chapped and dry from sub-zero winds. We are having a pretty good go of it this winter, thanks to whatever El Nino or ozone hole is responsible for this thusfar balmy March. Also, it has been a relatively stress-free time, not much hardship or things to escape from. Life is good, but it is always better with a drink with a little umbrella and your toes in the sand.
Part of it is probably cabin fever. Even though it is not a frozen tundra outside, there is still a limit to outside activity these days. No kayaking, no swimming. It's too muddy and mushy for the park or hiking or playing outside. Too early for the slew of fun spring / summer events. Not much to do between New Year's and Memorial Day except the same-old, same-old.
Also, it may be partly because my parents just got back from the Bahamas. I know, after all those years of vacationless parenthood with me and my brother, they definitely deserve some fun getaways.
Back when we were kids, their only vacation was running to the store for a few minutes. Not that every day with me and my brother wasn't a cavalcade of fun and whimsy and cleaning up messes. My parents have been blessed to be able to enjoy their dependent-free years, and they have. But I find myself being a little jealous. I can't deny it, I was hoping that my mom would call from the airport saying, "Oh, we can't go, the Bahamas sank into the ocean and we are being re-routed to Cheboygan." Oh, darn. Too bad.
Also, it may be because my brother got to work on a cruise ship for months, and reports of his tropic locales and island adventures made my Facebook feed a pit of jealousy. I don't like being jealous, I want my family and friends to enjoy themselves. But can't they pack me in a suitcase and tell the TSA that I'm stolen hotel towels?
It is also spring break time for most area colleges. The local Target is adorned with new swimsuits and shorts and flip-flops for those who get to abscond to rum-soaked beaches of never-ending limbo games and conga lines. Through all of my college-going years, I only got one spring break getaway, and I chose to go to less-tropical but still amazing Austin, Texas. It was brief, on the cheap, and lots of fun. It was also three years ago. I have nary left the confines of Ohio since.
So, I will dream of a vacation. Cue montage set to the Go-Gos "Vacation." Cruising along a sunny beach in a Jeep with a surfboard sticking out the back. Mixing it up with the island locals at a clambake, where a crab pinches someone on the nose and everyone laughs. Water skiing on the back of a party boat with one leg on the ski and the other holding onto the rope with my big toe. Sitting in front of a huge roasted pig wearing leis and stupid touristy straw hats. Hitting the jackpot at the casino and having coins spray out of the machine into a huge pile that I swim in and toss coins into the air. Being buried in the sand by the island children, posing for a picture, and hey, wait, come back and dig me up, kids. Hello?
Maybe my dream vacation will have to do. Money is tight, time is hard to come by. Maybe I will be able to go visit my friends in Santa Fe or San Francisco as I have been meaning to do since they escaped the land of snow and ice scrapers. Maybe I will even get to embark on a cool road trip soon, see some scenic locales. Hopefully, I get some manner of vacation soon. Even if it is just visiting an exotic out-of-town Target.
Got a vacation condo someplace? You can tell me where to pick up the keys at ssepanek@tribtoday.com, or comment on this story at www.tribtoday.com.