They say pride comes before the fall. They ain't kidding.
I've written before about my supposed imperviousness to getting sick. I've also written about how that attitude landed me in a big weeks-long bowl of sick. It used to be true. I used to be able to ward off disease with sheer willpower. But nowadays, whenever I say, "It's OK, I never get sick!" it comes back and bites me in the you-know-what. Maybe it's because I'm getting older. Maybe it's my comeuppance.
Either way, I awoke recently with a terrible fever and aches and chills. I spent much of the day wandering about in a haze, alternately wishing I was under warm covers or in a cold bath. This followed an episode where I visited a sick friend with get-well supplies, and when he voiced concerns over spreading his illness, I replied with my usual "Tut, tut! I never get sick!" Cut to me lying in bed, soaked in sweat, wondering if you can still catch typhoid.
Thusly, I have been running at less-than-stellar speed. Conjuring up a meaningful column topic was difficult. So, before my brains turn into scrambled eggs, I give you some general all-around facts about yours truly. Enjoy.
My favorite color is yellow.
I once did the Polar Bear Plunge - it was kind of awesome.
I am a Minnesota Vikings fan (thanks to WGH alum Korey Stringer).
Wool, some cats, random wine and crayons make me break out in hives. I belong in a bubble.
I have a cat named Jim Traficant (he only made me break out in hives for the first month or so). Jimbo for short.
I can always recognize celebrity voices in commercials.
For 10 years after I got my braces off, I couldn't whistle.
I have an unhealthy obsession with Vladimir Putin.
I collect concert posters.
My middle name is Lorraine.
I have tiny ears.
I'm terrified of extreme roller coasters.
My front tooth is fake, after a tragic roller skating accident at Champion Rollarena.
I won the Chalk on the Walk sidewalk art contest in downtown Warren twice as a kid.
I am a "Star Wars" fiend.
When I lose something, it always turns up eventually.
I can do the Jumble in the newspaper in a minute or less, usually.
I have a lot of big, stupid floppy hats.
One of my hobbies is kayaking.
I used to be a lifeguard at Willow Lake in Champion. I mostly fished dead raccoons out of the pool.
Even though I don't like Italian sausage sandwiches, I love the smell of them cooking at the fair. I wish they would make a candle out of that smell.
I am terrible at playing pool, which is strange because my dad is amazing at it.
I am a great winter driver.
I haven't seen any Disney movies since "The Little Mermaid."
RC Cola is my favorite cola.
I am really good at playing the game where you fish for stuffed toys with a metal claw.
I am really bad at most other games.
Despite being goth in high school, I wear very little black.
That's about it. That should be enough to figure out my Facebook password. My fever is beginning to break. Maybe next week I will be able to conjure up something more in-depth.
While I'm at it, I want to clarify something from my last column. I've received some emails and calls from people concerned about my friends and family saying I talk too much. I assure you, they aren't trying to change me, and it's just lighthearted ribbing. They accept me for who I am. Though I have made strides on at least my volume in the past fortnight.